118 bpm

We heard the heart beat! Baby Jane's heart is beating 118 times per minute. Anything over 100 bpm is good, so it's right on track.

However, there is a little bit of bad news. Baby Jane is a runt! She's only 0.5 cm long which is about the size of 6 weeks + 2 days, not 7 weeks + 1 day. The normal range of growth allows a baby to lag behind about 3 days, but we're more like 6 days behind, and that's not good.

The doctor said it's a "soft" sign, not a "hard" sign, because at that small size there could be an error in the ultra sound reading. We're going back next Monday to have another ultra sound, so this week I need you all to pray for a growth spurt.

The doctor said if the heart beat had not been good, then the 2 factors together would have meant the end.

After getting pregnant through IVF, at least at my clinic, the average rate of miscarriage is 10%. When the baby is small at the first ultra sound, that rate increases to 50%. But that also means there's a 50% chance everything is fine. Let's stay positive.

I did ask if there was anything I could do, and he said what's done is done. There is nothing I could do or not do at this point to help Baby Jane along.

I was hoping I could get off some of my meds today, but we were only able to switch them around a bit. I am going to stop the unmentionable one and increase the amount of progesterone I am taking in the shots to 2cc per day. That's a LOT considering it already takes (feels like) 10 minutes for Kelly to drain 1cc from the needle. Still, it's way better than the unmentionable.

Oh, one more thing, the doctor said because I am on progesterone there will be no symptoms if I miscarry; no bleeding, no cramping. I guess the progesterone continually tells your body it's pregnant and to keep going. The way we will find out is by looking at the ultra sound to see if that the baby has stopped growing or that the heart has stopped beating.

Here comes another "longest week of my life".